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Mark Simmons - Jest to Impress
Mark is back on tour in 2026 with Jest To Impress, a brand new show packed with even more expertly crafted one-liners, alongside his trademark off-the-cuff jokes based on random audience suggestions.
As Seen on Mock The Week, BT Sport and ITV, ‘master of one-liners’ Mark Simmons had a groundbreaking 200+ date sell out debut tour lasting two years, spanning the UK, Ireland, Australia, and New Zealand.
Mark is enjoying further success with his podcast, Jokes With Mark Simmons, where he invites a fellow comic, such as Gary Delaney, Sarah Millican, Milton Jones, and Penn and Teller to discuss jokes that they’ve written but for whatever reason couldn’t get to work.
Winner of Dave’s Funniest Joke of the Fringe 2024, recipient of Victoria Wood Panel Prize Fringe 2023, UK Comics’ Comic 2022 Best Act and runner up of Dave’s Top 10 Jokes of the Fringe 2022.
'Master of the crisp, clean, one-line zinger' ★★★★ Evening Standard
'A talented comic with an artisan’s grasp of joke writing' ★★★★ Chortle
'Master of one-liners…his show consists of literally one liner after one liner, with one or two breaks for the audience to catch their breath before another assault on the laughter and muscles with the next segment' ★★★★ One4Review
'Absolutely hilarious' ★★★★ Scotsman
Courtyard Theatre
£23
Age guidance: 14+ years
Norden Farm Patrons, Bronze, Sliver and Gold Members can click here to login for Priority Booking.
Mark's website
Insta JokesWithMark
Fb Mark Simmons
other events you may be interested in
Align and Flow Yoga
Led by Deborah Le Vene-Page
Align and Flow Yoga is influenced by the biomechanics and heart orientated philosophy of the Anusara Hatha style of yoga. With a specific alignment focus within the flow of postures the practice will tone and strengthen the body, improve posture and create more freedom in the body and mind resulting in a calm and relaxed state of being.
Each week there will be a different theme weaving its’ way through the session, but a typical class starts with breathing techniques to centre and ground, poses to warm up and then progresses to a fun and challenging mix of vinyasa and alignment yoga.
This class is designed to cultivate focus, stamina, strength, and flexibility. Leaving time at the end for a well-deserved relaxation.
Come prepared for an energising class that will also leave you feeling relaxed.
Age guidance: 18+ years
Spring
Sat 8 Mar - 26 Apr (8 weeks)
Summer
Sat 3 May - 21 Jun (8 weeks)
Sat 12 Jul - 16 Aug (6 weeks)
10am - 11am
£13 per session | £88 per 8 week course | £66 per 6 week course
Please note that the sessions below will be covered by the following tutors:
Sat 12 Apr and 14 Jun - Sarah Norman
Sat 19 Apr and 21 Jun - Michelle Carvill
Suitable for all levels of experience. Please bring a yoga mat with you.
Peppa Meets the Baby Cinema Experience
PIG changes are coming!
Join Peppa Pig and her family at the cinema as they get ready for their biggest adventure yet: welcoming a new baby!
There’s no better time to embark on a full house renovation, shop for a new car and make special memories together. Celebrate the beginning of an exciting new era of Peppa Pig at this special, big screen experience with an hour of laughter, tears and loads of heartwarming moments.
With 10 oinktastic new episodes, 6 brand new songs and music videos, your little ones can dance and sing along with Peppa and her family and friends. The wait is finally over... join Peppa and George as they meet their new baby sibling for the first time at Peppa Meets the Baby Cinema Experience!
Relaxed screenings
All of our screenings of Peppa Meets the Baby Cinema Experience are Relaxed - everyone is welcome to join us for this friendly format. The lights are kept on low and the audience are free to move around, make noise or come in and out of the theatre as needed.
Courtyard Theatre Cinema
£12 | £10 under 16s
Zumba (Saturdays)
Led by Annet Bowler
Zumba with Annet is a fun, easy to follow, dance based class. Get fit and exercise in disguise to uplifting Latin rhythms!
This 60 minute class feels more than a party that exercise class. It suits all levels of ability and beginners are very welcome.
Zumba is a total workout, combining all elements of fitness – cardio, muscle conditioning, balance and flexibility.
It can help make you feel happy, healthy, strong, amazing, unstoppable and confident!
Spring
Sat 11 Jan - 26 Apr (excl 1 Mar)
Saturday 8 March
Please note this session will be led by Antoinette Mc Shane.
Saturday 22 March
Saturday 29 March
Saturday 5 April
Please note these sessions will be led by Carla Leech.
Summer
Sat 3 May - 16 Aug (excl 28 Jun, 5 Jul and 2 Aug)
11.30am – 12.30pm
£7 per class | £30 for 5 sessions a term
Age guidance: 18+ years.
Disney's Snow White (PG)
Dir: Marc Webb 2024 | 109 mins
A live-action reimagining of the classic 1937 film. A magical adventure starring Rachel Zegler in the title role and Gal Gadot as her Stepmother, the Evil Queen.
Journey back to the timeless story with beloved characters Bashful, Doc, Dopey, Grumpy, Happy, Sleepy, and Sneezy.
£9 | £7 under 16s
Family & Friends (4 people) £28
Relaxed screenings
All of our screenings of Disney's Snow White are Relaxed - everyone is welcome to join us for this friendly format. The lights are kept on low and the audience are free to move around, make noise or come in and out of the theatre as needed.
Bring Baby Screening
The screening on Sat 24 May 11am is exclusively for parents, carers and grown-ups with children under 2 years. Lights are kept on low level and you can move around if you need to. Tickets are £5.50 for adults (including a cup of tea/coffee); babies and infants are free of charge. Seating is unreserved and unaccompanied adults are not admitted.
The JJ Cale Story
The UK's only J J Cale tribute act.
Now in their third year. Playing all his classic hits from Magnolia, After Midnight, Cocaine and many more which established JJ Cale's reputation as the master of laid back rhythm and blues.
Featuring songs from his collaboration album with Eric Clapton, Road to Escondido.
Studio
£16.50
The End (12A)
Dir: Joshua Oppenheimer 2024 | 149 mins
A Golden Age-style musical about one of the last families alive on Earth.
When the sudden arrival of a young stranger threatens the family’s luxurious compound deep underground, the son of the family begins to question their seemingly perfect existence.
Starring Tilda Swinton, Michael Shannon and George MacKay.
£10.50 | £9.50 conc
Neon Members - Free membership for ages 16 - 25
£5 (offer applied in basket once logged in). Find out more about Neon Membership here.
Three Films Ticket Offer
£9 | £8 conc tickets when you book for three films at the same time. Offer excludes event cinema screenings. Offer applied in basket.
Follow us on Letterboxd – the social platform for film lovers!
The perfect place to discover the latest films – as well as those you may have missed. Follow us here for the latest line ups, film news and reviews from our team.
Zen Drawing (online)
Led by Amanda Schenk
Amanda Schenk is the visual artist behind Norden Farm's much-loved (and Instagrammed) glass corridor artwork in the school holidays. Join Amanda for this new drawing course, aimed at helping to create a sense of calm and relaxation through drawing patterns.
Suitable for all abilities, the workshops will focus on building confidence in your drawing abilities - concentrating on the soothing journey of the drawing experience, rather than the finished drawing.
In each session you'll explore how to produce different types of patterns in abstract drawings - looking at different designs each week.
You will need: paper (plain, no smaller than A5), lead pencil, eraser, sharpener, black fine liner or a pen. Optional is a black marker.
Spring
Mon 13 Jan, 3 Feb, 3 Mar and 7 Apr
Summer
Mon 12 May, 2 Jun and 21 Jul
7.30pm - 8.45pm
£8 per class
Online only
Age guidance: 18+ years.
Crafternoons - Tuesdays
Led by Creative Eye
Norden Farm's Crafternoons are relaxed crafting sessions for older people.
Get crafty with a range of activities, or bring along your own projects to work on with support from tutor Kayleigh Robinson.
You can learn new skills, meet new people and try something new, a cup of tea is included with the ticket price. Come either Tuesday or Wednesday and join in that week's craft. If you are unable to attend in person you can log on from home to chat and join in the session.
Spring Season
Tues 11 Mar - Felt Keyring / Brooch
Tues 18 Mar - Woven Basket
Tues 25 Mar - Wool Hoop Art
Tues 1 Apr - Book Folded Sheep
Tues 8 Apr - Fabric Flower
Tues 15 Apr - Cube Bunny
Tues 22 Apr - Embossed Foil Decorations
Tues 29 Apr - Iris Paper Folding
Summer
Tues 6 May - Stencilled Hoop Art
Tues 13 May - Cupcake Case Flowers
Tues 20 May - No Session
Tues 27 May - Abstract Square Art
Tues 3 Jun - Glass Magnets
Tues 10 Jun - Mini Decoupage Sign
Tues 17 Jun - Quilling
Tues 24 Jun - Yarn Wrapped Vases / Jars
Tues 1 Jul - Dotty Tote Bags
Tues 8 Jul - Dried Flower Art
Tues 15 Jul - Wood Slice Nail Art
Tues 22 Jul - No Session
Tues 29 Jul - Bird Seed Ornaments
Tues 5 Aug - Yarn Canvas Art
Tues 12 Aug - Air Dry Clay Candle Holder
Social Arts Crafternoons is a partially funded project run by Norden Farm with support from The Berkshire Community Foundation.
Local transport can be provided as part of the ticket price for those attending on a Wednesday.
If you need transport to Norden Farm for the Wednesday sessions please contact Jess Thompson at [email protected] / 01628 682563 to talk through your requirements.
Suitable for ages 60+ years.
2pm - 3pm
£6.50 per session, including a cup of tea
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